I irritate myself so much, oh my god. One day I'm gonna throw myself out of the window, I swear.

 I'm always in two mental states at once and I don't know how to get of out that pathetic situation. The worst thing is, that I've been trasforming for such a long time and I still have no idea if the problem is my attitude, my head or my heart. It's different than ever before but I guess I know how it'll end.